Being Gaslighted By a Narcissist
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Have you ever known someone who makes you feel like you’re crazy? If you are in a relationship with a narcissist you surely have. These people keep you off balance and full of self-doubt. Once you know the way a narcissist functions you can begin to make your way out of their mind trap.
Being in a close relationship with a narcissist can be crazy making. They prey off your need for acceptance and feed off your trust. Learn about narcissist gaslighting and how a narcissist will leave you feeling both dazed and confused.
What is Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)?
Someone with NPD will lean towards people who they believe will cater to their ego. This victim will become the host from which the narcissist will feed. Someone with NPD will seek out a partner who is passive and shuns conflict. They see this type of person as an easy target.
To gain control over the host the person with NPD will purposely keep you in a constant state of confusion. Through their psych tricks they keep you feeling bad about yourself and unsure about what is real. You end up thinking that you are in the wrong and that they are the true victim. This classic narcissist gaslight tactic is quite common.
To better understand NPD here are the common symptoms and traits that define the disorder:
- Criticize the victim.
- Fits of rage, acts cruel to others.
- Lacks empathy for others.
- Takes advantage of others for their own gain.
- Torments the victim by causing fear.
- Becomes angry if the victim does not bow down and agree with them.
- Has no patience for other people’s feelings or needs.
- Thinks very highly of themselves.
- Will not admit guilt or apologize for causing pain.
- May isolate the victim from family and friends.
- Ego driven, self-important.
- Making the victim feel problems are their fault.
- Thinks people are jealous of them.
- Expects accolades.
- Unwilling to go to therapy.
- Cares only about their own desires and needs.
- Manipulates others to get what they want.
Being partnered with a NPD leaves you walking on eggshells daily. You always feel afraid and unsure of yourself because they have sowed these doubts through narcissist gaslighting.
The Fallout From Living With a Narcissist
It helps to know that a narcissist will select a certain type of person to become his or her victim. This person will be the one to bolster their sense of self-worth. Those with NPD are drawn to people who are people pleasers. These are kind people who nurture others and tend to have a lot of empathy. They become the perfect host for the NPD.
It is truly awful being tangled up with an NPD. These people are cruel and lack compassion. Their only goal is to keep you feeding their ego through exercising control over you. Over time, your spirit is broken. You become a shadow of who you once were prior to getting involved with the narcissist. Sometimes being with a narcissist can cause deep depression or even attempts at suicide.
What to Expect When You Ignore a NPD Gaslighting You
Someone with NPD is used to being in control. They have learned how to keep you under their thumb through fear and doubt. When you attempt to ignore their tactics they will become angry. This can result in some backlash and power plays. Some examples of how an NPD will react when you ignore them include:
- They may try to manipulate you through guilt.
- They may hurl insults at you, demean you or damage your reputation.
- They may ignore you back, for a while anyway, to reassert their power.
- They may stalk you or threaten you.
- They may become violent.
- They may cry or use sweet talk to regain your trust.
- They may threaten suicide.
It is crucial to resist engaging in any way with the narcissist. To break free from a person with NPD and narcissist gaslighting you must ignore them until they give up and move on. You must shut down their source of power. Do not allow them to get back into your good graces. Meanwhile, start working on your own healing process from a narcissist.
Breaking Free From the Person With NPD
Breaking up with a narcissist is the only valid solution. It is about self-survival. Try to ignore the NPD, even though it is not easy to do. But you must stop playing their game. Stop participating. He or she will act out when they realize their host is rejecting them. Often they will go to great lengths to draw the victim back in. This is because you have given them the fuel that propels their illness.
NPD is a mental health disorder. These people are harmful and cruel to others. Never lose sight that they are not healthy and can do great harm. Get the support and help you need to break free from the person with NPD and from narcissist gaslighting . There are abuse services that can assist you in finding safe housing if that is a concern.
Getting Therapy After Leaving the NPD Partner
Once you have reclaimed your mind it is time to get healthy again. Being with a narcissist can leave you in a bad way. The best way to pull yourself out of this sad place is through mental health treatment. You will need to work with a therapist who can guide you back to wellness.
If the harm done is severe then consider a residential mental health program. These programs offer a longer stay where you can slowly get your legs back under you. Just being in a nurturing place that is safe is a good choice after being with an NPD person. Treatment will include therapy, holistic activities, and group support. You deserve to be whole again, so get the help you need to thrive again.
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